Today, as I was driving to caregroup, I was talking to myself… like I always do when I drive. (what? it’s just thinking aloud, right?)
But today, I wasn’t being very nice.
I’m too negative.
I’m a complainer.
I’m not like this other person.
I’m just…not enough.
God calls Satan “the accuser.” The Accuser likes to tell us all the things we’ve done wrong to make us feel bad and keep us stuck in our sin. If we are convinced that we are “bad” we stop seeing the point in trying to do good. We don’t have a reason to struggle against our chains.
Just a warning, this isn’t going to be a very sophisticated blog post.
But isn’t that what we want? Something simple to fix all our problems? A lot of times when we think of encountering God, we have an expectation of discovering something deep and profound, instead of something that’s been staring us in the face all along. And tonight, simple was just the thing I needed to keep the accusations of the enemy from sinking into my heart and condemning me into feeling like less than I am.
Tonight, all we did was have prayer and worship. No fancy lesson with a profound message… just singing and talking to God who, despite everything, delights in me.
By the end of the night, when I got in the car to go home, the first thing that came out of my mouth was:
“Thank You, God.
Thank You that Your mercy is fresh every morning.
Thank You that You provide for me.
Thank You that You comfort me.
Thank You that You surround me.
Thank You that You love me, even when I’m bad, even when I’m angry, even when I don’t deserve it.
And thank You that Your love is enough to pull me out of wherever I have been.”
And that reminded me of Exodus 3:14, when Moses asks God who he should say sent him and God answers “I am.”
God could have been more specific… and yet He couldn’t have been more specific. He could have gone down the list of all that He is…
I am your Provider
I am your Healer
I am your Banner
I am your Creator
I am your Savior
I am your Redeemer
I am your Peace
But in an effort to save time, He just said, “I am.” Because He is everything. He is the giver of the very breath we breathe, and He created us with the intention of being involved every time we take a breath.
And isn’t it comforting to know that the same God who was with all those people throughout the Bible is the same God who is with us today? He never changes and His promises are true. So on those days when you can’t seem to remember anything good about yourself, or you have someone reminding you of all the times you’ve failed… start remembering who God is, and He will remind you of who you are.
I am praying to You because I know You will answer, O God.
Bend down and listen as I pray.
Show me your unfailing love in wonderful ways.
By Your mighty power You rescue
those who seek refuge from their enemies.