The Breathing Room.

I was listening to a sermon in the car with my mom the other day. I have no idea who the preacher was, she listens to a wide variety.  He basically called out the “speak the truth in love” people. He said we have been called to speak the Truth, with a capital T, not say something that’s true.

Tonight, I’m not going to be speaking any Truth in love, but I have a few things to say that I hope can get an amen, or at least get the ol’ cogs moving in that head of yours. It may seem random, but since this will probably be my only post of this nature, I want to be sure I get it all in. So, here goes:

1.) In my “sociology” class in high school (quotation marks because the teacher was an ex-parole officer, so it was really more criminal justice class), we learned about how societies function (only in the first week, after that it was all mock-trials). I understand when people say in America we shouldn’t ban things like drugs, prostitution (I want to talk about this more later), or gay marriage.I consider myself to be fairly libertarian, so the old adage of “If it neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg, what business of it is mine?” holds true in most cases. Like, I don’t think the government should have their dirty hands in marriage at all, as it is a covenant between two people and God. However, isn’t it up to the society to decide what is and is not acceptable? You could live on an island where it was perfectly acceptable to wear spaghetti as clothing. However, if you come to America wearing spaghetti, be ready to be looked upon strangely.  There are nudist colonies where being naked is accepted, but if you walk into Albertsons naked, be ready for a indecent exposure charge coming your way. I can hear some of you thinking, Ok, where are you going with this… so here it is: Even if legislation dictates it, it’s up to the society to accept and execute it. Right now we have a government who doesn’t like some laws, so they choose to not enforce them (i.e. immigration) so why can’t We The People choose to not obey some of the laws we don’t like? It’s a fair question, isn’t it?

2.)I said earlier that I wanted to talk about prostitution. Lately I have heard MANY people saying that it should be legalized or at least decriminalized. To these people I would like to say this: No woman who knows her true value WANTS to be a prostitute. You could say, yeah, maybe it’s not her dream job, but no one grows up wanting to work at McDonalds either. Touché. Here is something I would like to pose to anyone who says it should be legalized: Why do men need to pay for a woman to help them masturbate? I say masturbate because there is no emotional connection between the two parties, it’s purely physical. Why can’t these men find other ways to quench their desires? As a Christian, I don’t believe it’s ok to have sex outside of marriage, but if these are two consenting adults, why does money have to exchange hands? People joke that marriage is basically the same thing, but I think if that describes your marriage, that’s the saddest thing I’ve ever heard. Also, on another front, maybe instead of paying for sex, these men should be asking themselves “What is so wrong with me that I’m not getting it for free?” Maybe there are deeper issues that need to be addressed, and by legalizing it, they will never have to examine themselves…

3.) Ladies, we’re doing it wrong. I think all girls need to listen to the sermon “Dominion” by John Gray. One of the things he says that stuck with me was, “If you want a husband, then you need to carry yourself like a wife, otherwise you’ll have the spirit of girlfriend and little boys will play with you.” I was standing in the kitchen and I made my friend rewind it so I could hear it again, so feel free to reread it now. We’ve all heard the saying about free milk and a cow, and frankly I don’t like being referred to as a cow, but it’s a good analogy. If your boyfriend asks you to move in together because it makes more financial sense, tell him to hit the road. That’s guy speak for getting more of what he wants without having to make a commitment. When we as women hear that we hear “undertones”. We hear, “move in now to save some money for the big wedding we’re going to have someday.” We hear undertones because that’s how we speak to each other. “You’re wearing that?” “Your shoes are super cute!” “Maybe you should grow out your bangs…” If you’re a woman, you heard my undertones.

4.) College really isn’t a big deal, and no one cares about your alma mater except you. There. I said it. Also, your Prius isn’t saving the world.

5.) My mom and dad were never my best friend, which is why I love and respect them. If you have kids, never lower yourself to their level, it will damage the relationship. I know I’m not a parent, but I do have 2, and I’ve had friends whose parents wanted to be their friend instead of their parent. When I was a teenager, I wished my parents could be cool. I couldn’t understand why my friends with cool parents liked my parents so much. Now I understand that I got to be a kid when I was supposed to be a kid, while my friends are trying to navigate the blurred lines between the two, even now that we’re in our mid-twenties.

6.) I’m from the suburbs, with basically a crime rate of 0, so when I go into the city, I assume everyone is a murderer, rapist, or purse snatcher. I don’t give deference to skin color. If I’m in an unfamiliar place, I treat everyone equally as suspects in my could-be murder, so I really resent President Obama’s remarks that people who lock their car doors or hold their purses tighter to them when a STRANGER is around are racists. There have been a lot of things President Obama has said that are alarming, to say the least. I used to pray for him, that God would give him wisdom to lead this country into prosperity… now I’m praying that he will be impeached. If you think that makes me a racist, I’ll pray for you, too.

7.) I really try to not critique brothers and sisters in Christ. I know we’re all doing the best we can, and we can only walk in the light that we have… but I absolutely hate when Christians say “The world is just getting darker…” I mean, did you forget that YOU are the light? Satan is not winning this war, Christians are just losing it. We accept the lies that are being told about us, to us. We think, who am I to do this or that… but have you forgotten so readily who you are? Whose you are?

I’m getting tired of ranting, and you’re probably tired of reading, or you didn’t even make it this far. This world is not perfect, I’m not perfect, and I didn’t set out to offend or attack anyone tonight. I merely needed a space where I could breathe. If my breathing room has enlightened or challenged you in anyway, I’m glad. I think sometimes we all just need to say what’s under our breath. Air it out. Let it go so we can start over.

There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:

a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

— Ecclesiastes 3:1-8


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